I have previously written about Pilate’s questioning of Christ in John 18 (Que Est Veritas). My point in that post was that as a people, we are not very good at seeking the Truth. Since this post is about Truth, I’m calling it part 2.

I recently learned that the Japanese language has two words for truth in the context of society. They are Honne and Tatemae.

Honne is the underlying truth, what is real. Often this is hidden from the world or public.

Tatemae is the outward appearance, what we can see.

Tatemae is not always consistent with Honne.

I’ve reflected on this for the past few days. I once heard that achieving Zen is simply matching our insides with our outsides. I think of the movie 28 Days in which Sandra Bullock plays an alcoholic. She is taken to a farm and given the task of lifting a horse’s hind hoof off the ground. The horse is strong and cannot be forced, despite her attempts. Only when she matches her inside with her outside can she accomplish it. The last scene of the movie has her lifting the hoof of a police horse after finding her true self.

How many of us acknowledge that what is inside of us isn’t always pretty? And are willing to show it off anyway? In my life I have struggled with many sins which are well documented in the posts of this blog. And even today, I struggle. Everyday I strive to become more like Christ despite my significant shortcomings. He calls us to do this. Believing in Him obligates us to this.

I struggle significantly with mainstream Christianity in the United States and abroad. I see many attempting to live perfection without trying to achieve it. I also think this is why many Christians believe their sin only affects themselves, rather than the whole Body of Christ. It seems as though the Christian Tatemae is a mask for impurity, brokenness, and shame. Only Christian rock stars and preachers are to display their past shame as a method of conversion. And once they believed in Christ everything was fixed…right?

The Honne is very different isn’t it? How many preachers have fallen due to impurity? How many “good” marriages fail? Simply look at the divorce rate for Christians of 51% which is exactly the same as the national divorce rate of…yes 51% How many leaders’ careers and ministries shattered when the truth about their lives are known? One has only to look at Representative Anthony Weiner for an example. I could write an entire book on the topic of Honne and Tatemae in relation to pornography and impurity.

Rather in this post I want to ask a different question. Does our Honne match our Tatemae? Are we living proof of Truth? Or do we hide a lie deep inside?

Jesus Christ came for the broken, not the proud.
Jesus Christ called sinners, not the perfect.
Jesus Christ died for the poor in spirit, not the rich.

Which God do you worship? The one who is happy with who you are and doesn’t want you to change, because who you appear to be is already good enough? The “Come as you are God”?

Or do you worship Jesus Christ, Son of the Living God, who came to raise you to a new life. A life of Grace. A life filled with Him. A life in which our souls are purified daily by His blood. That’s the God I desire to worship with you. This is Our God.

Lately I’ve heard twice the quote ‘God accepts you for who you are but loves you too much to leave you there.’

Tonight as you pray, ask God to show you who you really are. And tomorrow wake and show that person to the world. That’s who we want to see. That’s who you were created to be. That’s the one who will change the world simply by being loved by Him.

God bless you.

What is Cafeteria Catholicism? Amazingly there is even a Wiki page dedicated to this topic! It says: “The term “cafeteria Catholicism” is a pejorative term applied to Catholics who dissent from Roman Catholic doctrinal or moral teaching.” That’s a pretty descriptive definition. In simple terms it means one picks and chooses which teachings they want to adhere to and which they do not. Most often this can be seen in relation to the Church’s teaching on birth control.

Soon to be ‘Blessed’ Pope John Paul II had this to say about this issue in 1987 to the Bishops while visiting the US:

“It is sometimes reported that a large number of Catholics today do not adhere to the teaching of the Catholic Church on a number of questions, notably sexual and conjugal morality, divorce and remarriage. Some are reported as not accepting the clear position on abortion. It has to be noted that there is a tendency on the part of some Catholics to be selective in their adherence to the Church’s moral teaching. It is sometimes claimed that dissent from the Magisterium is totally compatible with being a “good Catholic,” and poses no obstacle to the reception of the Sacraments. This is a grave error that challenges the teaching of the Bishops in the United States and elsewhere.”

There is also example of someone in the bible who chose not to accept everything Jesus offered.

Now someone approached him and said, “Teacher, what good must I do to gain eternal life?” He answered him, “Why do you ask me about the good? There is only One who is good. If you wish to enter into life, keep the commandments.” He asked him, “Which ones?” And Jesus replied, ” ‘You shall not kill; you shall not commit adultery; you shall not steal; you shall not bear false witness; honor your father and your mother’; and ‘you shall love your neighbor as yourself.’” The young man said to him, “All of these I have observed. What do I still lack?” Jesus said to him, “If you wish to be perfect, go, sell what you have and give to (the) poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.” When the young man heard this statement, he went away sad, for he had many possessions. – MT 19:16-22

The man in this story does many good things. Jesus tells him he lacks in only one thing. Yet this man could not (at this time) conform to Jesus teaching. He chose not to sell his possessions. He “went away sad”.

In today’s world, unfortunately, many Cafeteria Catholics do not go away sad. Rather the choice is to, through pride, state “I know better than the Church”. Really that is the message we send when we choose not to accept Her teachings. As stated previously much of this problem relates to teachings such as birth control.

I once met a man who told me he agreed with Humane Vitae right up to the end, but didn’t agree with the conclusion. Huh? How can you do that? Or rather, under whose authority? Jesus entrusted the teaching of His Church (faithful) to the Apostles and throughout the ages they have defended the faith and beautifully (well not so beautifully at times) instructed the hearts of Men. Through the Holy Spirit the Church is guided to Truth….. And you don’t agree with the conclusion? I simply don’t get it. Actually, I think he was the one who didn’t get it. ?

Cafeteria Catholics can be likened to church hoppers in the non-Catholic Christian arena. Those in this category attend church somewhere they are comfortable until the Pastor says something they don’t like or are challenged by and then in order to avoid the challenge, they hop to another church where the message is less challenging. So, we now have a phenomenon of watered-down-Gospel churches who teach a mere acceptance version of the Gospel. Don’t get me wrong, we in the Catholic Church have a lot to learn with regard to welcoming people, however watering down the Gospel isn’t the answer either.

In the end Cafeteria Catholicism is a consequence of the sin of pride. If we find ourselves challenged by a moral teaching of the Church, I hope and pray we have the courage to discern why we cannot accept it rather than to dismiss it as being wrong. The Holy Spirit will not allow the Church to fail; the Victory is already won in Heaven by Christ!

If you are reading this and think I’m wrong, that you do have the right to dismiss a teaching if it doesn’t suit you…well…let me ask you this: Why are you a Roman Catholic? (or whatever Church you belong to)

It’s like this. If you want to be a runner and call yourself a runner, then you have to run right? You have to train and become a runner. If you call yourself a runner and are actually a lazy-couch ridden-tv addict…then you aren’t a runner. The same is true here. If you call yourself a Roman Catholic then you HAVE to believe in certain things…because if you don’t then by extension you are not a Roman Catholic. Here is a simple, incomplete, and short list of some key beliefs of the Roman Catholic Church:

- The Eucharist is the Body, Blood, Soul, and Divinity of Jesus Christ. We receive Him in Mass.
- One must attend Mass weekly
- Sex is reserved for the marital relationship only.
- Birth control restricts the marital act and is not in keeping with God’s law (moral)
- All life is created by God and therefore has dignity
- Abortion is illicit under any circumstance. Even one which affects the life/death of the pregnant mother.
- Mary is the Mother of God and was without sin (Immaculate)

These are few of the Truth’s taught by the Roman Catholic Church.

We should be asking ourselves often: Am I in Communion with the Church? This does not only relate to sin, but to our beliefs. If we find that believing in a teaching is hard, then we have an obligation to learn more about it and conform our hearts.

“Jesus said to them, “Amen, amen, I say to you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you do not have life within you. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him on the last day. For my flesh is true food, and my blood is true drink. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me and I in him. Just as the living Father sent me and I have life because of the Father, so also the one who feeds on me will have life because of me. This is the bread that came down from heaven. Unlike your ancestors who ate and still died, whoever eats this bread will live forever.” These things he said while teaching in the synagogue in Capernaum. Then many of his disciples who were listening said, “This saying is hard; who can accept it?” – John 6:53-60

This saying is hard. Isn’t that the truth? For centuries we have been attacked for this belief and for centuries it has been hard to believe it. Yet we are called to believe and to accept Jesus in the Eucharist. Many have left the Church because they could not, rather would not, accept this teaching. Or the teaching on birth control, or the teaching on Abortion, or marriage, or homosexuality, or this or that. These are not arbitrary thoughts in the minds of some old guy in Rome. These are part of the beauty of the Catholic Church’s teachings. These are part of the beauty of revelation. These are the beauty of Creation.

My prayer is that we can continue to conform ourselves to the whole Gospel…not just the easy parts. I pray we accept the Resurrection AND the Cross.

Our true selves are only seen when we recognize God’s call on us. In paragraph 30 the CACC says, “Although man can forget God or reject him, He never ceases to call every man to seek him, so as to find life and happiness.”

When we answer God’s call upon us to seek Him, we find life and happiness. An existence void of God is hell, and so becomes our lives when we reject God. The sorrow a well formed soul experiences after sin is that of a rejection of God, or a mini-hell. I firmly believe that despair is a version of hell in our midst because those that despair reject God wholly and don’t understand their meaning or dignity.

Tonight while at my mens group, I was, and continue to be in awe of how God transforms marriages, if we let him. Of the men present, there are many stages of marital bliss. The common theme in our discussion is what is God calling US to…. The Catechism sums it up in the first paragraph… “He calls man to seek him, to know him, to love him with all his strength. He calls together all men, scattered and divided by sin, into the unity of his family, the Church.”

Tonight I type this to remind us of one particularly important, and glossed over statement in this excerpt from the Catechism. Read it slowly, intently, and let it sink in a second.

“He calls man to seek him, to know him, to love him with all his strength. He calls together all men,… scattered and divided by sin, into the unity of his family, the Church.”

We are all called to unity within our family, the Church. This includes the domestic church and the institutional Church. I know that when my wife and I are divided, our domestic church is faltering and functioning at less than 100%.

Too many times men are willing to point out the failings of our institutional Church leaders, organizations, committees, councils, documents, etc… And all too often those same men, self included, fail to recognize the problems inherent in our domestic church.

Read this.. Heb 13:4 – “Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge.”

I wonder if we spent more time helping men be positive and Godly husbands, would we spend less time dealing with domestic issues of divorce, abuse, fatherless children, alcoholism, pornography, etc.

A priest once said to me, our wifes are perfect in the eyes of God. I pray that God help me see my wife as He does. Not that I see problems with my wife, or that we have major issues (everybody has issues, some are major some are not), but I desire to love her as He does and to do that I must see her as He does. It’s not about me, it’s about Him.

The bottom line is this. Marriages fail because Men fail. Call it what you will, hate me, disagree, tell me I’m a sexist….whatever, I don’t care. This is the truth. Marriages fail because men fail.

Don’t believe me, ask yourself this…. Whose fault is it that Eve at the apple? Eve’s for being deceived and eating it? Or Adam’s for not putting the .40 to the snakes head when he tried to come into the house. Because I gotta tell ya, a thief and a liar tried to break into my house and he’s not going home in the same condition he came in. God entrusts the protection of Eve to Adam, and he screws it up.

It’s about time we stand up to the plate as men and take our strikes. Thank you to all of you Eve’s for taking up the slack as the spiritual leaders of the house while we were away…but now MAN is coming back. Men are becoming what we were created to be….Men seeking God so as to find life and happiness. It’s all about God.

It’s mans responsibility to lead his family to heaven, it’s about time to read the map, get on the road, and make it happen. Societal issues such as domestic abuse, abandonment, abortion, and crime are all in danger of extinction….because Man is making a comeback…

Okay.  So CA passed a ban on gay marriage.  I am supportive of this measure.  The union of two same sex individuals is not a marriage since it fails to meet the basic requirements of a marriage; to procreate.

I was reading today on Bloomberg.com about this ban and would like to share the following excerpts from the article:

“Real people are suffering today because of the decision we made last night,'' Newsom said yesterday in an interview on local CBS affiliate Chanel 5. “I'm going to continue to fight.'' Derek Morales, a 35-year-old San Francisco resident, was so dejected that the measure had passed that he worked from home yesterday. Morales, who is gay and was raised Catholic, said he's always dreamed of having his wedding in a church some day. Now, with the vote banning gay marriage, he said that dream feels further away. “It's something I've wanted since I was little — to get married in a big Catholic cathedral,'' Morales said.  

How and when will this man’s dream ever come true?  Even if a marriage amendment was passed to allow gay unions someone please tell me how this could ever happen.  This man is so deceived that he believes one day the Catholic Church will allow him to get “married” to another man in a Catholic Church!  Does anyone else see the irony here? 

God ordained the world with certain operating procedures.  God MADE us Man and Woman.  Don’t let the world try to change what God made.  Listen even to the marital statements from the bible or in the marriage ceremony.  What GOD has joined let no man destroy.  God didn’t join two dudes. 

Why would anyone want to get unionized in a Catholic Church?  Why?  Because it’s a pretty building?  Brother Morales, I pray for you.  Honestly I do.  But my prayer is not that you get to marry another man.  My prayer is that you encounter the love that will fill your heart and sustain you in peace.

Second, read this…..

The campaign to amend the constitution drew more than $70 million to the groups involved in the issue. Apple Inc. donated $100,000 to opponents of Proposition 8. The Cupertino, California-based maker of Macintosh computers joined Google Inc. and Hollywood director Steven Spielberg in opposing the measure.

So, all of you who own and Apple computer……. No comment (I confess I covet one too, especially the really neat one at Best Buy). 

I use Gmail, which I’ll be changing soon.  As well as my usage of Picasa and any other Google based app.  I don’t continue to support organizations that blatantly attack the family. 

Steven, I’m very disappointed in you.  I don’t think ET will be phoning you anytime soon.

Lastly, there was this comment:

“The cultural acceptance of gay marriage is a long-term process,'' said Kolbert of People for the American Way.

Ms Kolbert….it will be a very long-term process because there will should never be a “cultural acceptance” of something that is soo bad for society.  But that is okay, you keep working on it.  The longer the fight for gay unions the longer we procreators have to out birth you. 

Just imagine the history books in a couple of hundred years.  Like the plant eaters and meat eaters before us we’ll be called the procreators and the cohabitates. 

All excepts from the article were italicized for identification.  The entire article can be found here: http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601082&sid=a8KY5.jY3o6o&refer=canada

 Watching them get married also brought me close to God in another way. When I first learned that they were to be married by a magistrate rather than in a church, I panicked. My sister-in-law grew up a Catholic and I feared that a wedding in this manner would present problems with God. After some searching I found, through the direction of a trusted friend and priest, that since she has chosen a non-Catholic faith and left the Church she was no longer bound by Catholic norms for marriage.

My response was not judgment, rather it was in fear that I became concerned for her. I did not want their marriage to be seen as bad by the Church. Nor did I want to subject us to the decision of supporting a marital ceremony seen as scandalous by the Church. I say this to point something out about Catholics, us, we the believers.

 The Church has a deposit of faith that is unchanged since Christ walked the earth and since the Holy Spirit first descended upon the Apostles in the Upper Room. This faith is constant and you can count on it. You and I can count on our faith.

Let me say it again. You and I can count on our faith.

You see, in my heart I knew this marriage was right. I knew that God wanted them to be married. But my lack of full understanding caused me to fear in my intellect that it would not be endorsed by the Church. I was ready, as Abraham was, to take one for the team and not go in my mind, but in my heart I was already watching them say “I do”.

“So Bob, what’s the point” you ask. The point my feathered friend is that the more we know about our faith and our Church, the better we can make decisions based on faith. I did exactly what I admonish others for doing…I made a decision about something without the fullness of truth as my guide.

How often do we do this? I can count on a calculator that has more than 7 digits the number of times I have heard, “I’m a practicing Catholic, man I try to get to Mass at least twice a month.” Or, “I believe in Abortion but I’m a Catholic and that’s okay.” Or my favorite, “The Eucharist is just a sign, that old ideal about it really being Jesus is over now.”

So here is my simple conclusion to this long post about me being a short sighted uninformed decision maker who learned his lesson.

Begin with love: If you truly believe, your heart won’t guide you wrong.

Back it up with Truth: The old ‘trust and verify’ method.

Trust your heart, verify with the knowledge of 2000 years of tradition and theology.

And lastly: ASK. My good friend Tom who has more than once said something smart told me I was crazy to not attend the wedding which affirmed my heart. Our true friends who know the desire of our heart is Christ, will always lead us to him.

So go forth, be fruitful in the Spirit, multiply if your are married, and…. Make good decisions based in faith. Until next time I’m your host…humble bob.